“Full of grand visions and the desire to do something great, I often couldn’t find the first small beginning and then the next small beginning. I couldn’t dial huge possibilities into small practical actions. I couldn’t trust that doing enough of what needed to be done today would, with time, render a path and an outcome that could be great. I had to learn to be in the process of transformation, not trying to be transformed. You can’t skip past creating to the creation.”
Boyd Varty, The Lion Tracker’s Guide to Life
Reflections
This . . . in a big way lately. Full of desire, paralyzed by choice.
“The only mistake is to not make any choice.” – Boyd Varty
I feel this deeply. Stuck in indecision, fearful of making the wrong choice. In my heart, I know there is no wrong choice. The decision about what to do next in life is all consuming. I’m at a crossroads. One path leads to a familiar place; the other leads to the great unknown. I’m pulled in the direction of the unknown.
“Step off the superhighway of modern life and go quietly onto your own track. Go to a new trail where you can hear the whisper of your wild self in the echoes of the forest. Find the trail of something wild and dangerous and worthy of your fear and joy and focus. Live deeply on your own inner guidance [. . .] The wild self knows what you were meant to do. The wild self is whispering.” – Boyd Varty
I hear whispers of the next small beginning. I can sense what I’m meant to do; it seems to be spelled out in my name.
- Melanie (I)
- Chase (seek out)
- Marshall (assemble to make ready for action)
I am here to seek out and assemble (information?) to make ready for action.
This vision is so grand and full of possibilities. It overwhelms me. I’m resistant to accepting this idea as truth. It implies writing is part of my destiny, something I’ve never considered to be my strong suit. Yet, every seemingly unconnected path that has led me to this point reveals an interesting throughline in my work, which centers on distilling information.
I’m drawn to the path of deeper meaning, probably as a result of being misinformed and misled a few too many times. Distilling information has become a beautiful obsession. Though the process is arduous, each writing session is a cathartic experience that makes me feel alive. As I type these words, I’m beginning to understand:
“The goal is not a fixed thing but a living creature. Perhaps this is always the highest pursuit of the trail: aliveness itself.” – Boyd Varty
The choice is clear: Pursue that which makes me feel most alive. As far as what to do next, perhaps the answer to the following questions will shine a light on the next small beginning that might just lead to something great.
“What’s the attainable, practical, and generous thing you haven’t done yet? What will it take for it to become a priority?” – Seth Godin, Seth’s Blog
